


Home is Where the Heart Is

by CivisCaeli



Category: Outsiders (TV 2016)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-30
Updated: 2016-04-03
Packaged: 2018-05-30 02:12:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6404521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CivisCaeli/pseuds/CivisCaeli
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hasil feels the lingering effect of his first encounter with Sally Ann. 3rd per. omni. elaboration of S01E01 and onward - plot is canon. Sasil (Sally Ann/Hasil) - On Hiatus; will finish after S01 ends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"You, Hasil… are servin' as th'distraction t'night," they'd said, patting him on the back before jogging over to their buggies and hopping on. "Krake's outta yeast and it's 'bout time we had ourselves a lil' fun!" another howled.

Hasil grinned. They hadn't gotten the Bren'in's approval, but he was still excited by the prospect of what would eventually be a night time run down to town. He hopped on his own vehicle, starting off after the group, the sound of their collective "Ged-gedYAH!" echoing its way through the trees.

By the time they arrived, night had fallen, and the city lights had become bright, decorating each building along the sides of the street. They headed for whichever store Big Foster fancied most at the time, Hasil coming up from behind through the door. Already, a path had been created with those walking out, who'd began dipping out of the way in either direction in an effort to avoid being hit. Hasil stopped a little ways inside the store before jumping off and making his way to the nearest cashier.

"Hello, thar, lady" he began, trying to catch her attention. Her eyes looked through him, and then past his shoulder as she watched his family search the aisles for what they needed.

"No, no, no," he pressed. "Don'tchu mind them… hey! Look'it me… hey!" He gestured to his eyes, until hers met his. "Look'it me." The cashier nodded, swallowing. "Hey… now, what's yer name?"

She stared innocently enough, clearly at a loss for words and inevitably unsure what the heck was even going on (and in truth, this was correct – the only intelligible thing running through her head at the moment was that this wasn't your run of the mill robbery in progress).

He was surprised by the way she looked at him once he'd managed to get her to see him. It wasn't the same look he and his kin usually received from the local townsfolk - she hadn't sneered at him, or turned away. It was almost as if she saw just another normal person. He found he liked that. Liked the feeling that came with being the center of her attention. Hasil smiled and shifted his head, his interest piqued by her silence.

"What's th'matter, you a wee bit shy?" Her mouth moved, but no sound came out. _Best come up with somethin' good, girl_ , she thought and struggled to get something out in time.

"I never seen…"

"…seen what?" he interrupted.

"… one of y'all before." She breathed, before looking away briefly, still unsure if she should be doing something else… _anything_ else but standing here, distracted (and purposely so, she knew), while merchandise was flying off the shelves.

His eyebrows raised. "One ah' _who_ all, before?"

She chose to ignore that sticky subject, instead moving onto the more pressing one at hand. "They… they… they can't just… take stuff…. Right?" Her hands rose, adding emphasis to what she thought was a well-understood concept and rather obvious problem that no one seemed to be doing much of anything about. But upon turning around to look for back up, all she found were empty registers. _Not good,_ she thought, forlornly. _Security cameras and all, and here I am, in front of a member of Kentucky's contribution to the "wonders of the world" list…. and destined to lose my job for it._ She could only sigh, and turn back around, meeting the eyes of the stranger ahead.

"We thank ya kindly for your generosity" he stated, presenting her with a tiny, delicately carved bird. She picked it up, understanding it to be symbolic of a trade – an exchange for the merchandise and an expression of thanks. She looked closer, holding it gently in her hands. It was beautiful.

His hand raised, motioning to her name tag. Having lived in this town as long as she had, she understood why, knowing the rumors of the mountain folk's illiteracy, and gave him what it was he sought.

"Sally-Ann."

"Sally-Ann," he repeated, a grin she couldn't help but find adorable, spreading over his face. "Like two names rolled up inta'one, that'sa beautiful thang!" Fueled by the sight of her lips, moving into a smile, he pressed onward again, hands spreading wide as he struggled to find the words to articulate his question; he felt it was like trying to find out why stars twinkle, or asking the sun or moon how they did what they do. "Say, Sally-Ann, how'dya get your hair to go like that? Like it… just… looks like ya got light… comin' off of ya."

Big Foster drove up behind him just then, delivering a gruff, "Are we done here?"

Hasil looked down, fighting off an oncoming blush and by the time Big Foster had left, the next few words had popped out before he could help himself. "You gotta boyfriend?" He was a man short on time, and he needed to know.

 _What. in. the. world. is. going. on?_ Sally-Ann asked herself, flabbergasted by the simply ridiculous notion that this, perhaps, had moved past his just being a distraction. _He's not seriously flirting with me, is he?_ The thought kept her silent, unable to find an answer suitable for a situation this bizarre. Thankfully, she didn't have to.

"Hasil, come on!" They'd called from outside, and he had little choice but to leave her, darting through the door. Sally-Ann peered out, the light inside the store obscuring her ability to see into the darkness clearly. They were gone, and were it not for the woodsy scent the feral stranger had left behind, Sally-Ann would have wondered if she'd actually imagined it all.

…well, at least until she looked at the ruined displays down the store's main aisle, that is. She shook her head and smiled, incapable of holding it back despite the additional work now added to her shift. _This was going to be a very long night._

* * *

Breathless from the night's excitement, Hasil followed behind his kin as the last in line, the cool air whipping past his face the faster he drove. After some time had passed, they'd made it back to the bottom of the mountain and drove up the grassy curve that began the trail that would start the way back up to their home. Hasil stopped, watching them disappear into the darkness of the trees.

He cut his own engine, getting off his vehicle only to begin shuffling and pacing restlessly. He didn't want to go home yet. Not yet. Not while he was this antsy inside, his limbs and the very tips of his fingers tingling with the desire to do something other than turn in for the night. He couldn't understand why he felt so empty all of a sudden. So sad and happy and nervous, all rolled into one.

Eventually, he turned to lean against one of the ATV's larger back wheels, trying to steady himself and focus; to listen to the sound of his breath reach his ears.

In… and out. In… and out.

But the sound of her voice wouldn't leave him. Nor the memory of her warm, chestnut skin and the way she'd looked at him with wide, bright-eyes, like a deer caught in headlights. The way a task as simple as the one he'd be given, had come to make his heart bang against his ribcage from the moment he first heard her speak.

His excitement, he found, was as agonizing as the thought of having to wait to see her again.

He'd been down to town more than once in the past, usually making up the last of the group Big Foster would choose to go on missions, whatever they may be. This was no big thing for him – as normal and part of life as anything else on the mountain. Just the same, he'd seen his share of womenfolk, both down there and up, but there was something so different about this one time. About her.

In the clan, the elders had a name for this sorta thing. Like a soul's unsettled affliction. Used to talk about it back when G'Win and Asa were a thing and looking to get married. Said half the time, you could hear G'Win's heartbeat echo off the trees whenever he appeared, and with the havoc it wreaked on her when he up and left, Hasil could remember once hearing her lament that Asa had plumb took her heart and every good part of her there was, with him.

One of these days, he decided, he'd have to talk to Lady Ray about it. About love.

Hasil sighed, gazing at the way the lights glowed from the little down not far away. Hopeless, he rubbed his face, eyes watering at the sense of yearning he felt, tearing him apart inside, the very threads of his being pulled taut, as if somehow, someway, he'd become tethered to the little lady with doe eyes and her two names rolled into one. He felt he could only stand to be but so far away from her, and for only so long. He'd have to go back down again. He _needed_ … to go back down again. Soon. And often.

The lights blinked at him, mocking and teasing him with their distance.

Somewhere down there, he'd left his Heart… and whither she'd go, there he'd find his home, also.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This couple won't leave me alone, so I think I'll use this story for prompts that align more fully with the show's plot, and use LL for the AU updates. Hope you enjoy!


	2. Chapter 2

When he reached the street, Hasil looked back up at the mountain, which towered above him. He sucked his teeth, frowning when it hit him – he'd agreed to be the lookout for Big Foster that night. The plan was to begin looking for new firearms for the fight against their impending dangers, and, in a way, haze Asa back into the clan.

"Asa's gotta prove 'imself n' show he's truly back in th'clan fer good an' ain't brung no wrong to th'Farrell name," Big Foster had said, his gaze steely as he eyed Asa from across the clearing. "Six months in th'pit ain't long 'nough to make good on ten years ah absence." He nodded slowly, brooding as he worked through the plans in his head. "If he really cares, he won't mind helpin' us git more gunpower." Head tilted to Hasil, Lil' Foster and a few others, he smirked. "Th'family's livelihood's at stake after all, ay?"

Lil' Foster had nodded in agreement, grinning, his hands flexing as if he was biting at the bit for another chance to please his father. Hasil only looked between the two with his usual silence, taking in the scene. His eyebrow rose as he studied Big Foster, watching him scheme up all manner of ways to get back at Asa, his laugh low and ominous.

This seemed odd to Hasil, as anyone in the clan would have thought Lil' Foster to have more of a reason to do so than his dad. Lil' Foster had been in a relationship with G'Win for ten years and running by the time Asa had come back, and it had been no secret within the family that G'Win was rather reluctant to marry him. Hasil, himself, had no vendetta against Asa, and had only really sat down to talk to him a few times, as he was only in his early-to-mid teens by the time Asa left the clan. Asa had been a bit older than him, not long before, finding out that he preferred spending time with G'Win more than anyone else.

Before those two became an item, from what Hasil could remember, Asa had generally been outgoing – a kidder who liked joking and spending time teaching skills to the smallest of the clan. But even Hasil had noticed the changes in his demeanor. He couldn't decide if it had been his time in the cage that did it, or his time traveling. From the little he'd gleaned from overhearing the elders talking, it had been a mixture of both, with the outside world outweighing the cage as the bigger and more stifling prison of the two.

As of late, Hasil had known the opposite to be true. He hadn't traveled as far as Asa had, but he hadn't needed to before the itching desire to escape the mountain began to build at the base of his toes, eventually easing its way along the edges of his stomach.

It had manifested itself the night before and he could feel it growing, persisting even as they had circled around the Bren'in and she'd told the clan about what she called the unfolding prophecy; even as he'd sat around the bonfire after, hearing the family chat. His trusty knife had been in his hand, and he had tossed and caught it, holding the handle in his right hand and twisting the tip of it against the pointer finger of his left, just to have something to keep his mind busy. He could remember the fidgety tap of his foot, the tempo of which, he'd used to count passing seconds, minutes and hours.

He'd done the same as he'd traveled down the mountain; unable to take his ATV this time due to the noise that it'd make, he'd taken the 3 hour hike instead, having paid attention to the time it took to complete. He'd have to, he thought, to better time his journeys into the city.

Traveling alongside the road, he walked, facing the cars as they came toward him, and was grateful for the fact that few were traveling that way at that hour. By the time he made it to the main road and intersection, he could recognize the store Big Foster had chosen. Looking around, Hasil saw that few people were in the parking lot, but still, looking as he did, he knew it wasn't the wisest thing to bring attention to himself after the disturbance the Farrells had caused.

He found a quiet spot that gave him a view of the store's entrance and hid himself in the shadows, waiting. Her register had been empty until then, and when she appeared, he held his breath, feeling his cheeks warm. The sudden tug he then felt in his chest made his heart flutter.

* * *

Hasil moved when the lights started to go off in the front of the store. The parking lot had become empty and though he didn't know how Sally Ann got home, be it by driving or walking, he figured, at least, that she wouldn't be coming out of the dark half of the store.

Moving around to the back, he made his way past machines and a cluster of cars. Assuming them to be those belonging to the store's employees, he hid next to the machine that looked the least like the others, leaning to wait against the forklift he'd found.

The sound of a squeaking door caught his attention shortly after. He looked, standing there motionless as two women walked out; hopefully, he wished, they wouldn't notice him. He didn't move again until the next squeak occurred.

Bingo.

There she was, bag in hand, and he couldn't be happier to see her.

He didn't want to startle her, so he stood slowly when she caught sight of him. She glanced back at the store, briefly, wondering if anyone knew he'd been hiding near the employee's entrance. Coast in the clear, she turned to face him. They held each other's gaze for a moment before Hasil spoke.

"Hey, Sally Ann, right?" he called softly.

"Yeah," Sally Ann nodded before slowly turning to make her way to her car.

"Got me a good memory for names," he offered, following her. "Where ya goin', Sally Ann?"

"Home."

"Wanna do somethin'?"

She turned, wondering if he knew what time it was. " _Now_?"

"Why not?" he pressed, hoping she'd give in, at least slightly. Even one inch would be better than none.

"Like what?" she asked, unsure why she was actually considering this stranger's offer. Half the time, she didn't even accept offers to hang out from men she'd known for years. She blinked, asking herself what was so different about this guy. Save for the fact that he'd grown up on the mountain, men were men, weren't they? With minor differences, sure, but fundamentally, all the same?

"Ah dunno… maybe get some chicken wings and some beer?" Hasil suggested.

Sally Ann pressed her lips together as she continued to mull over all of the reasons for why she was still standing here. Memories of the night before flashed through her head – the sound of ATVs, and the sight of him in front of her. What stood out most, for now, was the distinct lack of money present during the whole thing. She looked down, already knowing what the answer to her question would probably be. "Y'got any money?"

Hasil shook his head slightly, confirming her suspicions.

"So… what, we gonna rob it?"

"I dunno," he laughed. All things considered, it wasn't too crazy an idea for him. He wasn't quite cognizant of how to successfully do it at the moment, but he was certain that with Sally Ann's help, anything was possible. "...we _could_."

Sally Ann's laugh ended up being half exhalation and half disappointment. She opened the door to her car, reaching in to decisively drop her bag on the passenger seat. She had to, to prevent herself from inviting him in. "Look, you're nice, but…"

"But what?" he asked. And already, she could hear the change in his voice. What once had been the vessel for light-hearted banter had become a throaty rumble, hinting at his upset. She decided the truth would be best, so she told him, leaning her face slightly against the car door.

"I don't wanna go to jail. 'Kay?" And that was true. Sally Ann knew that if push came to shove, though the Farrells probably wouldn't end up in a jail cell, as an active member of the real world, she most definitely would; and given the chance to do so, the system would spare no expense in finding something sticky to charge her with.

Hasil, on the other hand, was unaware of this discussion going on inside Sally Ann's head. Being confined to his own body, he could only feel his heart becoming heavy in his chest, making him light-headed. He felt as if he were falling... as if he _had_ fallen, and tumbled down the side of that big mountain he'd taken so long to travel down with the hope of seeing her. He felt as if he'd crashed and was drowning in a pool of his own blood. Hasil dug his fingernails into his palm as he stood there, and the expression on his face crumbled.

He feared he'd never be good enough for her.

"G'night," she said, getting into her car.

"G'night," he responded, voice barely above a whisper. Blinking back his tears, he watched her drive away until her car lights disappeared, becoming indiscernible from the darkness.

At the stoplight a little ways away, Sally Ann could see him in the rear view mirror, his head slowly dropping as he stood there. She worried for him, and wondered how long it'd take for him to make it back up the mountain that night; but when the light turned green, she had no choice but to remind herself that, sadly, she didn't have the luxury of being able to go back and find out.

Saying a soft prayer for him, she hoped he'd be okay on his way home.

* * *

By the time Hasil entered the bar, he'd become a shadow of himself. He felt almost as if he'd become disembodied and could see the patrons in the bar from far off, turning to stare at him as he made his way to an empty bar stool. His fingers rose to touch a braid of his hair as their eyes bored holes into him. He imagined Sally Ann seeing of him what they saw – the long hair, the braids, the feathers, the animal skins, the kilt, the wife-beater undershirt. They were all undesirable attributes, and as so, Hasil was no more than an undone puzzle with too few pieces; and even he had begun to feel that he wasn't worth the time it'd take for anyone to finish putting him together, let alone bother to find his missing pieces.

He wanted to drink until he could forget. Until he could let go of that tethered feeling, and the sight of her driving away from him, because it had hurt too much to see, knowing that the one thing he wanted was for her to be close enough to feel their connection, too.

Hasil sat, and watched the man next to him move. _Good_ , he sighed. _Maybe this is my punishment for going along with Big Foster's plan yesterday._

"Ya got any whiskey?" he asked the bartender. The man's silence left him exasperated, bringing back up the painful memory of Sally Ann's making it clear that nothing came for free in this town. With no money, he presented the only form of currency he had. "Okay," he whispered, reaching into his pocket for a carved bird, and resting it on the counter.

"Junior!" someone called from the other side of the room. Hasil turned, looking in the direction the voice had come from. "It's on me." Hasil hadn't seen the man before, but took note of his attire, the way he held up his money and the shine of his necklace, before waving a hand in thanks and turning back to the counter.

He watched the bartender fill up his shot glass. "So, your womenfolk 'round here ain't too friendly, huh?" he directed forward, looking up at the man for a response. He received the same silence he'd been met with before, so he gave up, taking that as all the answer he needed. _Guess the menfolk ain't either,_ his mind added.

Swallowing down his whiskey, his eyes peered up at the glowing screen on the wall, but his mind fixated on the way it burned his throat going down, before causing a warming sensation to spread from his center, outwards. Finally, focusing on the screen, he saw them - scantily-clad women were gyrating their hips to music.

And even with the whiskey in his blood, Hasil couldn't understand the appeal.

It didn't take long before he left the bar, exiting the building in with the thought of a 3-hour hike in mind. Now numb, he found himself actually wanting to get home and sleep away the memory of the night's events.

"Hey there! You Ferrell or Shay?" came the question. It was behind him now, the voice familiar, and although Hasil turned at the sound of his last name, he hadn't needed to in order to recognize the source this time. Out of the building appeared the kind Samaritan that had paid for his drink.

Though it had been nice of him to do, Hasil wasn't in the mood for a conversation. Nevertheless, in his current state of mind, he'd not pass up a good fight if it came to that. He reached to his side, feeling for his knife. The action, however, got the man's attention and made him raise his hands in submissive surrender. Hasil eyed him warily, but complied with the questioning.

"Ferrell. Hasil Ferrell. That's m'name."

"I'm Butch," the man answered, hands still up.

"'ppreciate the hospitality, Butch. What do y'want?

"Say, Hasil," Butch started, pointing to the door of the bar. "Y'need money?"

"That ain't somethin' we take a lotta stock in."

"I didn't ask you if you _believed_ in it," countered Butch, walking closer. "I was just askin' if y' _wanted_ some."

Looking down, Hasil considered that, and decided he did.

* * *

When Hasil arrived home, the full volume of Big Foster's cries threatened to hit him hard, face first.

"Oh, no… No!"

The intensity of those wails made his heart drop into his shoes. In all his born days, he'd never heard Big Foster sound like that, and it frightened the hell out of him. As he rushed closer, he could hear other voices joining in with their crying. Entering the clearing, he could see them, huddled together.

He moved closer, but slowly this time, wanting to prolong the moments between now and when he'd discover what horrible thing had happened to make a man normally _over-_ concerned with upholding his tough reputation, to break down and publicly shed his tears.

Remembering his broken obligation to Big Foster, Hasil made his way to one of his cousins on the outside of the huddle, wanting to stay as far away from Lil' Foster as possible. "What's happened?" he asked, unable to see for the crowd.

The cousin tilted his head his way, moving in closer so Hasil could hear over the sound of the group. "Big Foster was out wit'a couple'ah others. 'pparently they decided to take Elon down th'mountain t'hunt. Said Elon had snuck with, so they made 'im th'lookout. Had'ah bad run in' with one'ah th'townsfolk, though. Th'low down, no good, trigger-happy bastard was evil. Shot'im knowin' damn well he was just'ah youngin."

Hasil swallowed, feeling his lip begin to quiver. A cold chill crept up his spine as he listened the tale and realized what happened. Children weren't supposed to leave the mountain, and certainly not without approval from the Bren'in, at the very least.

…but 8-year-old Elon had gone and taken his place.

A path had opened up within the group, making room for Big Foster to pass. Hasil looked to see Elon's small body in his arms, blood pooling to soak into Big Foster's shirt and down until it looked as if he'd been the one of the two injured during the ordeal. The look on Big Foster's face made Hasil grimace and squeeze shut his eyes, feeling his stomach churn and roll with nausea. Whimpering softly, he looked down, and allowed his eyes to blur over.

This was the second time he'd found himself near tears that night.

This time, he allowed the tears to fall.

* * *

As a sign of respect, the mourning family members were quieter than usual when they headed off to their respective houses for bed. Their silence made the woods seem even deeper, the mountain growing darker as it loomed, widening itself to accommodate the sudden growth in sorrow. Once in bed, Hasil drifted but tossed and turned, his sleep restless and fragmented.

Five words made their way into his dreams that night, burrowing deeply until they attached themselves to him like ticks, becoming filled to fat off his dwindling sanity until he woke up, drenched with sweat and shivering. His chest quaked silently, shaking his shoulders and he touched his cheeks, finding that he'd been weeping in his sleep.

The truth had knocked the breath out of him, tipping him off balance and making him gasp for air between the sobs. He reached, frantically, for the last words Sally Ann had said to him, suddenly made aware by the content of his nightmare that his reaction to her hadn't been punishment but a blessing. She'd played a part in saving him, he now knew, because had it been a mere few days earlier, he'd have been right there with Big and Lil' Foster, carting Asa off on a sore-intentioned misadventure.

He'd have been utterly lost without her.

Five single words had disturbed his sleep and terrorized his mind, so he fought them, using as a shield, the only two words that could soothe him. "Like what?" Sally Ann had asked, indicating, he realized, that she _would_ have gone out with him had they'd simply had the means to viably do so. She'd left the door of opportunity wide open for him, and holding onto that newly found hope, he kept replaying those words to himself until the trembling left his mind.

He hoarsely whispered the five words then, letting them exit his lips into the night air and leave him. He was determined to release them, and leave them, defenseless, to fend on their own against the trees and harsh elements of Shay Mountain.

From that night forward, he vowed he'd have no more to do with them.

_"That should have been me."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: In case there's some confusion, that the "them" he'll have no more to do with are the 5 words (as in they'll no longer have control over him), not his family, etc.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own the canon characters. Everything pre-owned belongs to its owner(s). No copyright infringement intended.


End file.
